Starting All Over Again
This is my coin. It's a little blurry, but Mac gave it to me last Monday for being sober for 24 hours. I've been sober longer, but I like shiny things, so I didn't say anything.
Yesterday as I was sitting out on the verandah with Dick, I was noting that AA recognizes 30, 60, 90 days, and then 3, 6,9, and 12 months before recognizing yearly anniversaries. Some of the people in the group have been sober for 15 years. "I just can't imagine that," I said. "You'll get there," he said.
It just seems so far away. I know in the long run that I will be happier, but I am seriously mourning the death of my relationship with red wine. This is par for the course, I suppose. I told my parents that I was probably going to end up having to bathe in it as opposed to drinking it. This would be an expensive habit, and my skin would be quite pink. At least I'd always have that rosy hue!
It's still one of my dreams to open a winery and make a really great non-alcoholic red. As far as I'm concerned, they ALL taste like ass. I also feel that wanting to open a winery means that I am still living in the great state of denial, population of ONE. It's just a dream.
They posted my story about my first meeting on doitsober.com, and I was politely surprised. It's a new site, but HEY! I am webamous!
My fourth meeting is tonight; I hope that there are some girls there.
Labels: alcoholics anonymous, anniversaries, sobriety
This entry was posted
on Thursday, January 04, 2007 at 2:14 PM.
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Sweetie, I'm reading your other blog too. Sorry I haven't commented here in a while. My life has been crazy too! I couldn't imagine what it would be like to be on that island going through what you're going through. I'm sure its difficult to find a shoulder or support.
However, keep trying - don't give up. You know what the right thing to do is and you may have to skywrite it so its there in big bold letters to remind you.
It's hard but I know you can do it.
C,
Thanks for your words of encouragment; they really help. It is insane trying to do this on an island the size of a petri dish; everyone knows what you're doing regardless of whether you want them to or not. Fortunately I have found several very solid shoulders that are there to hold my hand whenever I feel like the crack of a beer or the pop of a wine cork would be more comforting...one day at a time, right?
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